Vinnie "David Bistro" Biros

Vinnie Biros, the pint-sized tornado of tantrums and incompetence on the Thunder Cunts golf team, is a marvel of contradictions: hilariously short in stature yet toweringly pompous in demeanor. This ill-mannered gnome somehow manages to be the biggest know-it-all douchebag around, despite being consistently wrong about everything from golf swings to basic human decency. His legendary temper tantrums have left a trail of broken drivers reminiscent of a petulant child in a toy store. Before his illustrious golf career, Vinnie braved the mean streets as a delivery driver for Jeff Bezos, navigating the worst neighborhoods with all the charm of a rabid raccoon. And now, in a plot twist too absurd for fiction, he's set to become the brother-in-law of Dan Vish, the chiropractor so universally despised even his own team can't stand him. It seems the Thunder Cunts are truly a magnet for the most spectacular misfits life has to offer.